In this blog post, we talk about aging - Aging With Power. Not fighting aging (personally a term I loathe) but leaning into it with intention, to live it not with grace but with power.
"I AM INVINCIBLE. "When I feel empowered and when I am healthy I am strong and then I can do all the things I need to reach in order to fulfil my big dreams that are as big as the world and as optimistic as my mind can imagine. I will age with power and influence change because I know my purpose." Norma Kamali.
This edition of Beyond The Shop is a little different. It's based on a book that really touched my soul. The passage above is actually its cover - it's the author's mantra. Her name is Norma Kamali. I was instantly captivated by these words, by the design of the cover and wanted to dive and and discover more.
Today I'd like to share it with you in the hope that you find that it sparks a flame inside of you. As we navigate midlife and choose to Age With Power.
'It all started with '50 Tips On Turning 50' Norma wrote in a moleskin notebook as a 50th birthday gift for a friend. When others saw it, they were so inspired, they encouraged her to write a book and publish it. And so, I AM INVINCIBLE was born. I sense that origin in this book. Like it's written for a friend. Simple truths. Upfront. From the heart. Norma wrote the book at the age...75.
I AM INVINCIBLE is that 'handbook' for life.
"...every time any woman feels like she has it together, and what I mean is something even as simple as her hair, and her body fitting comfortably in her clothes, and her attitude is balanced, she feels invincible and when a woman is invincible she gets it done. It is exhilarating to experience and exhilarating to observe.
When we are informed and we can prepare for the unknown. It gives us all a chance to be invincible. ..Therefore the book." Norma Kamali.
Aging with Power. Not grace. Because grace implies fading away.
I don't know about you, but I have no plans to fade away. I'm excited for this next stage of my life, the next half. To chart its course with intent. To be the healthiest, kindest, best version of myself I can be. And empower others to do the same. To Age with Power.
Normalife - The 3 Pillars
When Norma talks about Aging With Power, it is based on 3 lifestyle pillars - Sleep, Diet & Exercise. Nothing new in many ways. But it's the way she breaks it down, making it simple, attainable and with a healthy dose of truth. Her truth. Some of it I don't necessarily embrace, but maybe I'm just not there yet. Maybe I won't ever be. But I do love the way in which she puts her experiences, and her truths out there for us to take from them what we choose. And maybe we'll take from it what we need when we need it.
A strong theme in each of these pillars is that they incorporate daily habits founded on self-love. Intentionally crafted to sustain a healthy mind and body. She's BIG on daily habits. Many of which, as she rightly points out, are free.
Sleep - The Ritual of Sleep.
- It's 50% of the pie - treat it as a respected ritual. "For me meditation breaks taken throughout the day have proven to be a great way for me to temper anything stressful that might throw out my routine. If you can do this during the day and maybe an hour before bedtime, it will be so helpful."
- Your bed is your sanctuary. Make it an inviting and beautiful place to restore and reconnect.
Diet - A Lifestyle Choice - not a fad diet.
Food is nutrition and food is medicine. Listen to your body and what works well for you.
Food as love. Food can heal.
Exercise - Be Fit. Don't Quit.
Norma has a daily routine of exercise moves she does at home. Every single day she moves with intention.
"Working out should be as routine as brushing your teeth. Once you start exercising every day, it becomes second nature."
- To better manage stress, and build physical strength, balance, flexibility and bone health.
- It's about having respect for yourself. Be fit. Don't quit. Make exercise fit your habits.
Age with Power - Through The Decades.
Written by a woman in her 70s reflecting on each of the decades of her life, it's a brilliant journey through our ages, highlighting the feelings and sentiments we hold in each. It very much resonated with me and what I have lived and experienced so far. And as a woman in her 50s, I can better appreciate how I may feel and what may lay ahead in my 60s, 70s and beyond. If I have the good fortune to get there.
"Every decade comes with a different set of challenges and opportunities. Everyone has a different path and plan. Reaching your potential doesn't have a date. Aging with power is how you get there."
Teens - Surprise! Pimples, periods and puberty.
20's - Pretending until we figure it out.
30's - Life's big challenges get real.
40's - I know who I am and I am making it happen. Hello hormones, don't mess with me now.
50's - Reinvention! Big changes begin - finally, maybe long overdue.
60's - Unfiltered, unedited. It's me, At last!
70's - If you only knew - live your purpose.
80's , 90's, 100 - keep dancing!
The book goes into greater detail on each of these Ages and how our power evolves. Written with much insight, thoughtfulness and wisdom. So much to take away and learn from.
Now it's over to you...
Has your image about yourself changed as you've gotten older?
Looking back on photos of yourself as a teenager, in your 20s, 30s 40s do you remember how you felt about you at that time? Was it a time of not thinking about how you looked or was it something that did play on your mind...constantly. Or maybe it oscillated somewhere in between.
Looking forward, do you worry about how you will look? Or is it more about how you will feel? About what your body will be able to do?
How do you see yourself aging - your future self?
The kind of woman you want to become. Because no matter what age we are, we are all still learning.
We have mentors for our professional growth but how many of us have mentors for 'life growth'. Women (and men) we look up to who inspire us, who show us the 'how to', the way.
Norma is 75. Norma's life mentors are women who are 100. Why, because her goal is to live to 120. Now she knows that it's highly unlikely BUT it's what guides her and glides her forward. With intent, with power.
I absolutely love that. And it's not something I had ever consciously considered, having a 'life' mentor. Women to inspire and shine a light ahead for me. I now do. Norma is one of those women for me. There is a connection even though we've never met - down to swimsuits! Style, purpose and the empowerment of others. And these passages in particular:
"When I was first starting out, I was quite frankly shocked that anyone would pay to buy my designs. It was meaningful for me to understand that clothing could affect self-esteem, especially since, at that time, I was wondering what value my work had when people were finding cures for cancer and I was obsessed with the length of a hem."
"A swimsuit is either the most liberating or intimidating piece of clothing a woman wears. Reaching the place where you feel your best is a process. I've learned that a healthy, fit body is always a work in progress and that remaining faithful to the 3 pillars of sleep, diet and exercise is the most powerful support system we have for feeling good about how we look. The swimsuit really doesn't matter; it's how you feel in your head about your body. The way you carry yourself says everything about how you feel. This is true for anything you wear."
Her clothes and swimsuits are the medium. It's what they enable women to feel, to do that matters most.
And that's what drives purpose. And purpose fuels power.
I personally relate to this soooo much. Swimsuits are the medium. Cossie Confidence is what drives my purpose - YOUR Cossie Confidence. It fuels my power every day.
What fuels your power?
What, when you talk about it, lifts your mood, your spirit? You feel lighter, maybe you feel literally 'fired up' inside? You may talk faster, can't wait to get the next sentence out as you talk to a friend, a stranger about it. Lean into that. That's fueling your power.
A Note To Your Future Self
What would it say? It's pretty powerful to do. Have you ever done it? Without overthinking it, have a go. Stop now and grab a paper and pen and start to get it down. Here's mine. Raw and real. No over-editing. Straight from the heart.
"Life will be a mix of what you love and at times, what you don't. It will test you no doubt. But you will know what to do. It will come to you, eventually. Trust in that. Trust in you. You will change as you age, shaped by the influences, events, beliefs, people, and circumstances that your journey will open up to you. Go with that. Learn from it, but always be true to you. Age with power. Not grace. With the intention to want to live it strong. Your health is what will sustain you. Look after your mind and body. Find ways to nurture and strengthen it each and every day. And never forget that being here is a blessing. Respect that gift and pay it forward by looking after yourself and others. Age with power beautiful one. With both hands, with kindness and love. With intent, with purpose and empower others to do the same."
Where to from here?
Write your Future Self a note. Maybe buy the book and soak up all the rich advice :)
Continue the conversation of Aging With Power over in our private Facebook group Women 40+ Self Love, Body Love, Summer Confidence. You'll need to be a member to join in. It's easy to do. Click on the link above and ask to join. We'd love to see you there. If you're already a member, thank you!
Anita xx
(Founder & Owner: Sequins and Sand)
